xt92879

I learn and re-learn that silence doesn't protect me - an
unexpressed life is very painful to myself and those I love.
I am learning that loving all the way can ache + sting, but
loving halfway doesn't keep me safe, it leaves me with
sadness and a hope that could never live out loud.

Sabrina Ward Harrison - Spilling Open

I've got a limited amount of time, right? I want to spend that time having fun, meeting new people, making friends, dancing a lot, drinking even more, sleeping around, playing around, being around, exploring the world, learning who I am, reading, listening to music, being inspired, screwing up, screwing off, spinning in circles, riding my bike, being close to others, kissing, crushing, working, eating, being present, seeing movies, downloading, uploading, crosstraining, swimming, hanging out, being comfortable, dressing up, sleeping in, loving, being forgiven, admitting mistakes, taking risks, learning lessons, making memories, forgetting regrets, being honest.

Active is key.

I like to throw parties. I have 3 tattoos. I have a cool birthmark. I've got some cool scars. I've met some stars. I've been to one wedding. I love the beach.

I can't cut anyone off, even if they really deserve it. I'm compassionate. I'm a navy brat. I spend too much time on my computer. I've never, ever used illegal drugs. I get attached. I like coca-cola. I should go to the gym more. I'm very picky about what I eat. I'm very 'emo.' I'm very inexperienced. I've seen a lot. I want an MBA.

I need some help getting it together. But I try. I give it an effort. I believe in people. I try to be a good friend. I care about you...even when you don't care about yourself. I will treat you well.

I'm not so bad. I smile too much when things aren't great. I am paying attention to you - I'm just doing this at the same time. I will wait for you. I'm really very simple. I don't understand myself. I crave companionship. I just want to be left alone.