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I love my friends. But I love my music even more.

Whenever someone close to me has a birthday, I make them a specific mixtape tailored to their interests. Sometimes I combine them if two friends have close birthdays. Depends on how many blank CDs I have or how lazy I feel.

And since all these compilations are different and fun and awesome, I figured I should share them with you.

NOTE HUNGRY
(made for Connor. His taste in music is a lot like mine, but with more house/ambient/trance stuff. I think this is a result of dating for seven months. Anyways, he's the only kid I know who likes Joy Division as much as I do.)

1. Gillian Nothing - Six
2. Suicide - Cheree
3. No Age - Teen Creeps
4. Hüsker Dü - Broken Home, Broken Heart
5. Liars - Let's Not Wrestle Mt. Heart Attack
6. HEALTH - Crimewave
7. Sonic Youth - Kill Yr. Idols
8. Lydia Lunch - Run Through The Jungle
9. Kraftwerk - Trans-Europe Express
10. Hercules and Love Affair - Blind
11. James Chance and the Contortions - Roving Eye
12. Mission of Burma - That's When I Reach for My Revolver
13. Pere Ubu - Dub Housing
14. Mars - Hairwaves
15. Massive Attack - Exchange
16. Luomo - Lonely Music Co.
17. M83 - Up!
18. Ride - Kaleidoscope
19. Vitalic - Poney Pt. 1

Some shoegaze, some trip hop, a little no wave. Funfunfun.



TRIPPIN' BALLZ
(Made for Claire, who does not have a last.fm. She read my TOP ALBUMS OF 2008 post, which I copied onto facebook, and went to Slumdog Millionaire and then decided to trust me and downloaded the Portishead record. Loved it. Asked for "trippy" stuff like that.)

1. Wendy Carlos - Title Music from A Clockwork Orange
2. Röyksopp - Someone Like Me
3. Flying Lotus - Melt!
4. Luomo - Nothing Goes Away
5. Ride - Vapour Trail
6. Télépopmusik - Breathe
7. Portishead - Only You
8. My Bloody Valentine - Only Shallow
9. Slowdive - Alison
10. M83 - Kim & Jessie
11. The Jesus and Mary Chain - Inside Me
12. Fuck Buttons - Sweet Love for Planet Earth
13. Brian Eno & David Byrne - The Carrier
14. Caribou - Pelican Narrows
15. HEALTH - Crimewave
16. Massive Attack - Teardrop
17. DJ Shadow - Building Steam With a Grain of Salt





MUSICAL VOMIT
(made for Grace Ann, who also doesn't have a last.fm. She's not the most knowledgeable when it comes to music. I have taken it upon myself to educate her. So far, her favorite song is Yoshimi. Not surprised.)

1. Depeche Mode - Personal Jesus
2. HEALTH - triceratops (acid girls remix a)
3. Girl Talk - Shut the Club Down
4. Happy Mondays - Kinky Afro
5. Foals - Red Socks Pugie
6. Black Kids - I'm Not Gonna Teach Your Boyfriend How to Dance With You
7. The Cure - In Between Days
8. Deerhunter - Nothing Ever Happened
9. New Order - Age of Consent
10. Gang of Four - Damaged Goods
11. Devo - Jocko Homo
12. Talking Heads - I Zimbra
13. The Flaming Lips - Yoshimi Battles The Pink Robots, Pt. 1
14. Lou Reed - Walk on the Wild Side
15. Pixies - Gigantic
16. Modern Hoax - deadened nerves
17. Radiohead - The National Anthem
18. Max Green - Yeah, Grace




BELEXA BELATED BIRTHDAY MIX
(Not creative, I know. Made for Ben and Alexa. Their birthdays are two days apart, so I combined them)

1. Steve Wright - Home Of Rock
2. Public Image Ltd. - Religion I
3. Public Image Ltd. - Religion II
4. Big Black - Tiny, King of the Jews
5. Butthole Surfers - TV Star
6. The Human League - Being Boiled (Fast version)
7. Liars - Grown Men Don't Fall in the River, Just Like That
8. Talking Heads - Psycho Killer
9. The Replacements - Bastards of Young
10. Sonic Youth - Schizophrenia
11. New Order - Confusion
12. Teenage Jesus and the Jerks - I Woke Up Dreaming
13. Suicide - Cheree
14. Arthur Brown - Fire (Mono Version)
15. Lou Reed - Hangin' Around
16. Mission of Burma - That's When I Reach for My Revolver
17. X-Ray Spex - Art-I-Ficial
18. Ramones - Have You Ever Seen the Rain

ALEX/LUCIA
(Made for, duh, Alex, and Lucia, who doesn't have a last.fm. Their birthdays are also two days apart.)
1. Modern Hoax - bent fist
2. Orange Juice - Rip It Up
3. Santogold - Lights Out
4. Mission of Burma - This is Not A Photograph
5. Pixies - Vamos
6. New Order - Ultraviolence
7. Suicide - Shadazz
8. Ben Folds - Bitches Ain't Shit
9. Lou Reed - Vicious
10. The Beach Boys - Wouldn't it be Nice?
11. Talking Heads - Girls Want to Be With the Girls
12. James Chance and the Contortions - Roving Eye
13. Heaven 17 - (We Don't Need This) Fascist Groove Thang
14. Addressing Adeline - Umbrella Man
15. The Cure - Close to Me
16. The Rapture - Don Gon Do It
17. Joey Ramone - What a Wonderful World

EVAN!/TAXMAN!
(Made for Evan. No last.fm. Is an opera singer. No joke.)

1. Siouxsie and the Banshees - Hong Kong Garden
2. of Montreal - For Our Elegant Caste
3. N*E*R*D - Everyone Nose (All the Girls Standing in the Line for the Bathroom)
4. Patti Smith - Ask the Angels
5. Sonic Youth - Kool Thing
6. The Stooges - Search and Destroy
7. The Velvet Underground - Run Run Run
8. Devo - (I Can't Get No) Satisfaction
9. The Clash - Police and Thieves
10. Television - Friction
11. The Smiths - This Charming Man
12. De La Soul - Me Myself and I
13. Talking Heads - Burning Down the House
14. T. Rex - Jeepster
15. Frankie Goes to Hollywood - Relax
16. Radiohead - 15 Steps
17. Pixies - Where Is My Mind?


Everyone so far has LOVED their tapes. It's important to me to make these personal, that's why there are so few ovelaps.

More to come.

Other Notable Albums released in 2008 (that were not in my top ten... with a few words about them; in no particular order)

1. Flying Lotus - Los Angeles
Downtempo/trip-hop fun fun fun? Makes me space out a little. Ideal when you have nothing else to do.

2. TV on the Radio - Dear Science
I have no clue why this isn't in the top ten. It's pretty awesome.

3. My Morning Jacket - Evil Urges
As overrated as this band is (and this new beard-rock revival in general is), I found this album likable. Not great, but likable. It's got a great title though. Now shave, dammit!

4. The Black Keys - Attack & Release
They're great live. Not as good as Rubber Factory. A little mellower.

5. Lil Wayne - Tha Carter III
I feel bad for not putting rap on my original list. So here's this one and...

6. Black Milk - Tronic
Also pretty good.

7. HEALTH - HEALTH//DISCO
Remixes. Fuuuun.

8. Be Your Own Pet - Get Awkward
Great album title. I'll miss this band.

9. Hot Chip - Made In The Dark
Fuckkk. I totally forgot this record. It's so dancey/fun/hilarious.

10. Nine Inch Nails - Ghosts I-IV
Cool free-download concept. Cool record. And I like the album covers. (Hi Jorin!)

11. David Byrne and Brian Eno - Everything That Happens Will Happen Today
They could read out of a phone book and I'd still like it.

12. The Knux - Remind Me In Three Days
Refreshingly original 'Nawlins hip-hop. Katrina, fuck yeah!

13. Lykke Li - Youth Novels
Swedish and so sweet you'll get a toothache.

14. Beck - Modern Guilt
It was okay. But it's Beck and I love him. And Dangermouse. And I love him too.

15. M83 - Saturday=Youth
Perfect for gazing at the shoes of your choice.

OTHER NOTABLE MOVIES (also in no order)

1. Doubt
Great acting. I'm surprised whoever played Mrs. Miller didn't get some sort of Golden Globe nomination.

2. Frost/Nixon
I'm not usually one for political films, but this one was well done. Good acting, great buildup, and even a little comic relief via some Italian shoes and Kevin Bacon being... Kevin Bacon. For some reason, everything that man does seems like a joke to me.

3. The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
Okay, so it was too long. And Cate Blanchett made me want to slam my head in a car door. But other that that, I'm good. Brad Pitt was interesting to watch.

PERSONAL BEST MOMENTS:

1. This dinner conversation:
Mother: *Blabs on about work*
Dad (angrily): Sherry, what is wrong with you tonight?
Me: Oh, Dad. She's just being Miley. *Uncontrollable laughter*

2. Getting existential with Morgan (basically a crazy-high night with my friend that ended in a conversation involving Rene Descartes and Spongebob)

3. Austin City Limits
A favorite part? Oh... I don't remember.

4. South By Southwest
A favorite part? Being stage-dived on (and subsequently crushed) by Thurston Moore. *dies*


OTHER SUPER-CATCHY SONGS

1. Miley Cyrus - See You Again
Is it bad that I know all the words to this? Or that I thought it was Ashlee Simpson for a while?

2. M.I.A. - Paper Planes
This one made a serious comeback. Who knew Clash samples could hit the top 40? Not Joe Strummer, who I'm sure is rolling over in his grave.

3. Lil Wayne - Lollipop
That came out this year, right?

My Top-Ten Favorite Albums of All Time (not in any particular order; one album per artist):


1. The Velvet Underground - The Velvet Underground & Nico

This particular record comes to mind for several reasons. 1. I have it on yellow vinyl, which is fucking cool. 2. It has the song “Heroin” on it. 3. The cover is all most people know about it, and 4. It’s amazing. I only had their other self-titled (the one with “Pale Blue Eyes”) before I bought this record, and VU&N turned me into a bonafide fan. I have all the Velvet’s records (except the ones Lou Reed wasn’t on) and all of Cale’s and Reed’s solo records. Berlin is brilliant, but I would have felt like cheating by including it on here (see one album per artist rule). In addition to kick-starting punk rock, this record kick-started the music industry, taking everyone by storm. It’s not only great, but it’s controversial. And that’s just what great rock-n-roll is supposed to be.

Best song: “Heroin”

Worst Song: “Run Run Run”

2. The Ramones - “Rocket to Russia”

If it weren’t for the Ramones, I wouldn’t be such a music freak today. Sure, I was into the shitty music everyone likes when they’re twelve (Blink 182, etc.). But nothing prepared me for the musical inundation I experienced once hearing this record start to finish. I immediately wanted more. And I got more. And I loved it. This is also the first record I taught myself to play start-to-finish on guitar. And I’m sure that says something.

Best Song: “Teenage Lobotomy”

Worst Song: “I Wanna Be Well”

3. Joy Division - “Unknown Pleasures”

From the depths of some sort of dark hole or cave comes creepy baritone. Add in the atmospheric drums, the catchy guitar riffs, and rollicking bass, and you get Joy Division, one of the darkest fucking bands ever that still somehow makes you want to dance. The band only put out two records (Unknown Pleasures [1979] and Closer [1980], which would be on here if not for the one-per-band rule), but those two records are crammed with some of the most desperate, depressing, and beautiful songs I’ve ever heard. It’s hard for me to talk about Joy Division without mentioning two things: 1. Lead singer Ian Curtis committed suicide at age 23 right before the band’s first American tour, and 2. They eventually (plus keyboardest Gillian Gilbert… cool name) became New Order after Curtis’ death. Both of these lead me to wonder: if Curtis hadn’t died, would Joy Division be this awesome? Answer: probably not, but then again, that adds to the mystique of the music.

Best Song: “Disorder”

Worst Song: “Wilderness”

4. Radiohead - “Kid A”

I’ve always liked Radiohead, but I never really “got” them until I listened to Kid A while stoned. Oh my god. Here’s the thing about Radiohead, and I paraphrase Chuck Klosterman here: they’re the only band that is simultaneously over- and underrated. I have no clue how this happened. Everyone who knows enough about music to like Radiohead finds them ingenious. Most of the world, however, doesn’t appreciate it. My mom calls OK Computer “lots of droning.” Ok, Mom. But wait ’til you hear “Idioteque” after a few bowls. Maybe that will change your mind.

Best Song: “Idioteque” … duh

Worst Song: “Morning Bell” (Amnesiac version is better)

5. Neutral Milk Hotel - “In the Aeroplane Over the Sea”

This is one of two records in the world that give me chills (other is Kid A, see above). Aside from the fact that Jeff Mangum is a fucking genius, this whole record has some kind of weird emotional significance to me (maybe I’m in love with Anne Frank too…). It took me a few plays to get into this, but once I did I couldn’t listen to anything else for quite some time.

Best Song: “Holland, 1945″

Worst Song: “The Fool”

6. Sonic Youth - “Goo”

Most people are gonna say Daydream Nation. I’m surprised I didn’t say Daydream Nation. But this was my first Sonic Youth album. I have it on iTunes and on vinyl, and I have a t-shirt with the cover on it. Kim Gordon is pretty much the reason I play bass. This record is full of crazy ideas, all of which seem to work. It also helps that two of the best Sonic Youth singles (Dirty Boots and Kool Thing) are on here. And one of those features Chuck D. How totally badass.

Best Song: “Kool Thing”

Worst Song: “Mote”

7. Weezer - “Weezer (The Blue Album)”

A lot of people hate Weezer. I love Weezer. The one thing everyone has to remember about Weezer is that the whole concept of the band is to be ironic. Once you keep that in mind, this record becomes about 200 times more enjoyable. I’ll agree with the general public on one thing though: They have sure been going downhill since Pinkerton (or, as some may argue, this record). I don’t think Weezer will release another good album, which is why I hang on to this one so tightly.

Best Song: “Say It Ain’t So”

Worst Song: “In the Garage”

8. Gang of Four - “Entertainment”

John Sellers argues in his book “Perfect from Now On” that there is a type of record called a dinger: an album that has all good songs that one does not tire of upon (at least) the first five listens. He claims there are only eight of those in existence, but he doesn’t include this one. I’m going to add this onto the list of dingers. There is not a bad song on this record, sure, some are better than others, but I’m not about to toss out the record because of one sub-excellent song.

Best song: “Natural’s Not In It”

Worst song: “I Found That Essence Rare”

9. The Smiths - “The Queen Is Dead”

You know a band is genius when absolutely nothing any members put out sans the rest of the band is any good. Case in point: The Smiths. Morrissey’s solo albums suck (my opinion) and Johnny Marr’s post-Smiths work is average, at best. When combined, the two create a tour-de-force of morose lyrics and jangly, chorusy guitars that are unmatched by any other band of their era, or any other band, period.

Best song: “The Boy With the Thorn in His Side”

Worst song: “Vicar in a Tutu”

10. Pixies - “Surfer Rosa”

If I could record my brain activity in musical form, it would come out sounding somewhat like the Pixies: sometimes spastic, often lethargic, occasionally in random bursts of Spanish. Kim Deal is another reason I play bass (what’s up with all female bass players being named Kim? Well, not all of them, just my two favorites). When I first got this record, I couldn’t believe I hadn’t heard it before. Suddenly, everything made sense. I was the Pixies. The Pixies are me. Black Francis may very well be reading my mind right now. I hope he can block out the fact that I’m considering how totally unsexy he is.

Best Song: “Where Is My Mind?”

Worst Song: “Something Against You”

This was not an easy task. And by not easy, I mean mind-blowingly difficult.

TOP TEN RECORDS

10. Portishead - Third
You know, I never really cared about Portishead until quite recently. Trip-hop is not something I normally listen to, as I do not take ecstasy. But you know, that's cool. An added bonus: my mom has decided she really likes this band as of last night when I was playing them.
Mother: This is rockin'.
Me: Not quite...

9. Hercules and Love Affair - Hercules And Love Affair
Like a Euro-trash disco from hell. And what about their haircuts? Oh my God. How wonderful. I got this about a month before it came out thanks to some savvy friends, and I will forever be in their debt.

8. Girl Talk - Feed the Animals
Holy shit... Gregg Gillis rules. Anyone who combines The Cure and Wu-Tang Clan is totally awesome in my book. He also made Avril Lavinge marginally listenable.

7. Santogold - Santogold
Enough with the MIA comparisons. I see it too, but Santogold is fucking punk rock. And yeah, I know using that as an adjective makes me an asshole. So what.

6. MGMT - Oracular Spectacular
A cool-sounding band with cool-looking members. If my boss this summer hadn't insisted on playing this record for a straight month, I'd put it at number one. However, everything gets old at some point.

5. of Montreal - Skeletal Lamping
I can't dislike an Of Montreal record. It's impossible. The only downside to this one is it's not as awesome as last year's Hissing Fauna, Are You The Destroyer? and therefore I'm still listening to Hissing Fauna instead of this one. But with hooks like "We can do it softcore if you want/but you should know that I go both ways," it's bound to become a classic.

4. Vampire Weekend - Vampire Weekend
Four WASP-y dudes from Columbia make Afro-beat. Not quite as lame as it sounds. Also helped bring back topsiders.

3. Deerhunter - Microcastle
Bradford Cox is an interesting human being. This album is good in a way that's almost too hard to put into words. Just listen to it and you'll get my drift.

2. TIED
No Age - Nouns & Fucked Up - The Chemistry of Common Life
Okay, so I cheated. Both of these albums needed to be up here though. They both blew my mind. No Age crafts noise-punk almost as nifty as any Liars songs (or for that matter, 90sSonic Youth).Fucked Up are gonna be the saviors of hardcore (prediction alert!). Both records draw you in at the first note and rape your eardrums all the way through to the end. And that's totally a good thing.

1. Crystal Castles - Crystal Castles
I've never heard anything like this before in my life, and nor do I think I ever will again. Every single genre of music can be found somewhere in a CC song. I dare you to look. I dare you to listen. But mostly, I dare you to dance!


TOP TEN CATCHIEST SONGS
(Disclaimer: This category has nothing to do with taste. It has to do with the most ubiquitous songs I've heard this year.)

10. Rihanna - Disturbia
That intro! My god! Bum bum-bee-dum, bum-bum bee-dum-dum... I'm humming it right now.

9. Kid Rock - All Summer Long
This is totally sad, but Kid Rock kinda made me like him (and Lynrd Skynrd) because of this song. I should be shot.

8. Britney Spears - Womanizer
Welcome back, Mrs. Federline! And everyone thought she was gonna die this year. Well guess what? She's still alive (sort of) and rocking (sort of).

7. Flo Rida ft. T-Pain - Low
Shit. There are no words to say how fucking annoying this song is. Every fucking dance I went to this year, they played this song at least twice. The worst part is, the words are so memorable they just get stuck in my brain. Fuck you, auto-tune.

6. Fall Out Boy - Beat It
So depressing it almost made me cry. There should be a law against covering Michael Jackson.

5. Ting Tings - Shut Up And Let Me Go
I kind of liked it 'til I saw the video, which reminded me too much of the White Stripes and then I got mad b/c of the utter lack of originality.

4. Leona Lewis - Bleeding Love
Shut UP! This is like emo pop. Should not exist. Does not compute! *Head explodes*

3. Pink - So What
"So what/I'm a rockstar/I've got my rock moves/and I don't need you..."
Yeah, those are the lyrics. Yeesh.

2. Coldplay - Viva la Vida
I'll admit; I liked it at first. It sounded like Chris Martin & Co. stepped out of the fucking box for once. But then I heard it again. And again. And again. And I wanted to fucking punch that guy, not just for making this song but also for naming his son Moses, which is gonna suck for that poor kid when he hits kindergarten.

1. Katy Perry - I Kissed a Girl
...And I liked it. I actually fucking did. So kill me. It's awesome to hear my mom singing this song. Seriously, who knew lesbianism was so universal?


TOP TEN OMG/WTF MOMENTS
The terms are often interchangeable.

10. OJ Simpson goes to jail. Kind of like what should have happened in 1995, but not for killing his wife.

9. Michael Phelps wins 8 gold medals, makes America give a shit about swimming.

8. McCain picks Sarah Palin as a running mate. I think the only applicable words here are OMG/WTF?!?

7. Bailouts. And where exactly are we gonna get the money to do the bailouts with? I'm confused. Because I thought the US debt was in the trillions nowadays.

6. Chinese Democracy comes out. Lots of men who were teens in the late 80s/early 90s simultaneously jizz their pants.

5. Obama wins! Sort of predictable given the circumstances, but I'm still pretty stoked.

4. Amy Winehouse and Britney Spears don't die! Whoa... Well. There's always next year ladies. Until then, who wants some crack?

3. Tom Cruise in Tropic Thunder. Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahhahahahahhahaha. Best part of the movie.

2. 808s And Hearbreaks. How entirely lame of Kanye to make an album where he hardly raps. Shame on you, dude. Last year you released one of my favorite records. Now I just wanna kick your ass and tell you to stop dressing/acting like TV on the Radio. Works for them, but not for you.

1. Heath Ledger dies. Completely blindsided here. He's been one of my favorite actors since 10 Things I Hate About You (shut up) and The Patriot (although now I can't watch that because Mel Gibson makes me nauseous). This whole thing made The Dark Knight so much better I'm sure, but we still lost an amazing talent just waiting to be recognized. RIP, dude. I hope there are gay cowboys wherever you are.


TOP TEN MOVIES OF THE YEAR
This is slightly incomplete because there are still movies I need to see (Doubt, Frost/Nixon, The Reader, The Wrestler, Gran Torino, Revolutionary Road...)

10. Iron Man
I swear, comic book movies this year (except Hulk, which sucked) were really fucking great. Can't wait for Watchmen. Also, Robert Downey Jr. is pretty sweet.

9. Burn After Reading
I love Brad Pitt, I love George Clooney, I love John Malkovich (in some sort of ironic way), I love Francis McDormand (ya know?), and mostly, I love the fucking Coen Brothers. I saw this movie ALONE, which is a first for me. I felt like I had to though, since at 17 I can get into R movies sans my mother (who went without me). She's the best movie partner ever b/c she usually shuts up until the end (when she cries).

8. Tropic Thunder
Not actually very good at all. Just quotable, in a Napoleon Dynamite sort of way. And Robert Downey Jr. and Tom Cruise were fucking great.

7. Rachel Getting Married
Anne Hathaway shows that she has depth, and that dude from TV on the Radio shows he can act. Also had some good music. A win-win.

6. Pineapple Express
Weed + James Franco = awesome. I missed half the movie from laughing so hard.

5. In Bruges
Highly underrated. I laughed, I cried, I even almost shit (shat?) my pants. Kind of made me like Collin Farrel, skeezebag that he is.

4. Slumdog Millionaire
Made by the director of 28 Days Later. Interesting combination. An amazing film with amazing acting and amazing... everything. Shit. Go see it.

3. Quantum of Solace
I'm just kidding. This movie sucked. I just couldn't think of what to put here. The whole movie was Daniel Craig pouting hilariously.

2. Milk
Sean Penn BECAME Harvey Milk. I've always been slightly fascinated with Milk the politician, but in this movie I got to learn about Milk the person. I haven't cried so hard in a movie since God-knows-when.

1. The Dark Knight
Can't avoid it. Everything about this movie was great (except for Christian Bale's "I'M BATMAN!" voice). Especially Heath fucking Ledger. The Joker needed an update, and he got one he deserved. If Ledger doesn't win Best Supporting Actor, I will overdose as well.


TOP TEN BIGGEST DISAPPOINTMENTS

10. Choke
There will never be another Chuck Palahniuk book adapted into a movie again, because this one ruined it. What a shitty film. Compared to Fight Club, this thing is Gigli.

9. Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince pushed back to next year.
Fuck you, Twilight. Fuck you.

8. Lindsay Lohan is gay!
I have no clue why this is disappointing to me, as I am a female and therefore this raises my chances of getting with her. I suppose most men are pissed though.

7. Chinese Democracy. Not like we expected it to be any good...

6. Celebrity baby names.
I have a weird obsession with weird names. And this year, they just weren't very good. Come on Britney's little sister... Maddie? That's so common! Sadly, the best name I heard this year was Bronx (Ashlee Simpson's kid). Shit...

5. The snow in Houston lasted only one day
Come on.... Just one more day. And please, let it stick so I can make a snowman! (for those of you who are not familiar with east Texas, the winter in Houston usually never drops below 50 degrees Fahrenheit. Also, it's only ever snowed here once before in my life.)

4. Quantum of Solace
Why, James, Why? Casino Royale was great. This one, not so much.

3. Tropic Thunder
Should have been so much better than it really was.

2. Raconteurs and Gnarls Barkley follow-ups.
Utter suckage. Next time, do a little press first.

1. Love Lockdown
What have you done, Kanye?


TOP TEN BIGGEST PERSONALITIES

10. Kim Kardashian
Who is this woman and how the fuck did her ass get so disproportionately huge?!?!

9. James Franco
So he played a stoner in one movie and made out with Sean Penn in another. Does that make him God? In an interview for Pineapple Express, he said he prepped for his role as a dealer by "making out with Spicolli." What an awesome guy.

8. The Joker
Not a real person, but pretty damn close. Also, the top Halloween costume choice of the year (mine was Amy Winehouse).

7. Michael Phelps
I have never seen a more awkward-looking dude in my life who can get that many chicks. Comes with the gold, I suppose.

6. Spencer Pratt/Heidi Montag
Someone kill them before I do. I can't seem to go anywhere without hearing about those two fucking morons! Help!

5. That guy who leaked Chinese Democracy.
Yay for pissing off Axl Rose, boo for getting caught, you idiot.

4. Judd Apatow
Good luck finding a comedy he DIDN'T make.

3. Tina Fey
Comedic fucking gold. She did the best impression I've ever seen in my life of...

2. Sarah Palin
HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA. Is this woman for real?

1. President-elect Barack Obama
Yes. We. Can. And he did. I actually believe in this country again!


TOP TEN TRENDS

10. Vampires
Between Twilight and True Blood, I'm watching my neck.

9. Auto-tune
It's annoying. I'm sorry.

8. Lesbianism
Katy Perry. Lindsay Lohan. Sounds like a collaboration from hell.

7. Voting
People actually did it this time! Too bad I'm 10 months too young... I still campaigned my ass off and got both my parents to vote Obama in the election (they went Hillary in the primary).

6. Batman obsessiveness
Who didn't see The Dark Knight and then have some sort of philosophical question about it?

5. High-waisted pants
Yucky but everywhere. Mom jeans are not cool. Stop it.

4. Facebook chat
It's ruined my life and my grades. Dammit.

3. Beards
Everyone has one these days. And I think they're weird. There's a reason ZZ Top hardly had groupies.

2. Vinyl
It's back and bigger than ever! (Sort of.) Vinyl sales are the only form of music sales that increased this year. Hell yes.

1. Complaining about gas prices
If you didn't do this this year, you're either Amish, living under a rock, or both. I spent over $70 filling up my tank this summer. That's fucking ridiculous.




Thanks for listening/reading. Here's to 2009 and (hopefully) the release of a new My Bloody Valentine record!

Peace.
Gillian


EDIT: Today, Dec. 15, someone threw a shoe at President Bush. To quote Austin Powers, "Who throws his shoe? Honestly?" As much as I don't like W, I'll admit he has great dodging abilities. He got out of the way of that shoe really fucking fast. I guess that's what you get for spending 8 years with Dick Cheney.

51st Grammy Nominees are in. Here are the categories I actually give a shit about (or at least know something about) and my predictions. Winners I'd pick are underlined. Winners that will actually win are in bold.

RECORD OF THE YEAR

Adele - Chasing Pavement
Coldplay - Viva la Vida
Leona Lewis - Bleeding Love
M.I.A. - Paper Planes
Robert Plant & Alison Krauss - Please Read The Letter

Reasoning: Okay, so we've got two semi-Winehouse ripoffs, a Radiohead ripoff, that asshole from Zeppelin singing blues, and fucking MIA, who samples the Clash and the "ching ching" of a cash register. Nothing's more original than MIA, and it's pretty rad that she's finally getting some mainstream recognition. However, there was no track more inescapable this year than Viva La Vida.


ALBUM OF THE YEAR

Coldplay - Viva la Vida or Death and All His Friends
Lil' Wayne - Tha Carter III
Ne-Yo - Year Of The Gentleman
Robert Plant & Alison Krauss - Raising Sand
Radiohead - In Rainbows

Reasoning: See above for Coldplay. Also, Radiohead just fuckin' rocks. They won't get it because the Grammys are too scared to look outside the mainstream. Rap never wins this category. However, we might get a surprise from Plant and Krauss, because lots of times the "old favorites" win here. I hate that shit. If you wanna award the dude from Zeppelin, give him something for Zoso or whatever. Not this shit.


SONG OF THE YEAR

Estelle feat. Kanye West - American Boy
Adele - Chasing Pavements
Jason Mraz - I'm Yours
Sara Bareilles - Love Song
Coldplay- Viva la Vida

Reasoning: Love Song is downright annoying. I don't like Adele. I'm Yours is too cutesy. American Boy is... well... I dunno. This is Coldplay's year.


BEST NEW ARTIST

Adele
Duffy
Jonas Brothers
Lady Antebellum
Jazmine Sullivan

Reasoning: Gag. None of the above. The only guess I have is that it's not the Jonas Brothers.


This is getting to be too long, so here's my choices for some other important (at least to me) awards (reasons in parenthesis):

BEST FEMALE POP VOCAL PERFORMANCE
Katy Perry - I Kissed a Girl (It would just be really funny.)

BEST DANCE RECORDING
Hot Chip - Ready For The Floor (So catchy, so fun, so... eccentric.)

BEST ELECTRONIC/DANCE ALBUM
Daft Punk - Alive 2007 (I like the live versions of their songs better than the recorded ones.)

BEST ROCK PERFORMANCE BY A DUO/GROUP WITH VOCALS
Kings of Leon - Sex on Fire (The Radiohead choice was House of Cards, which is one of my least favorite songs on the record. Besides, Kings of Leon are pretty much the definition of "rock."

BEST ALTERNATIVE MUSIC ALBUM
Radiohead - In Rainbows (Um. Duh. The new Beck is average. Ditto Gnarls Barkley. I don't like beards, so My Morning Jacket is out. And I fuckin' hate Death Cab.)

BEST RAP SOLO PERFORMANCE
Nas - N.I.G.G.E.R. (The Slave and The Master) (Dude's got balls. That's all I can say.)

BEST SCORE SOUNDTRACK FOR A MOTION PICTURE
Johnny Greenwood - There Will Be Blood (Like nothing I've ever heard. If they don't give any awards to Radiohead, they've gotta give this one to Johnny. Besides my love for Radiohead, There Will Be Blood was my top Oscar choice last year and is still and always will be one of the most fucking awesome movies I've ever seen.)

BEST BOXED OR LIMITED-EDITION SPECIAL PACKAGE
Radiohead - In Rainbows
OR
Nine Inch Nails - Ghosts I-IV
(The two bands who pioneered the pay-what-you-like phenomenon deserve some credit. Can we split the award?)

PRODUCER OF THE YEAR, NON-CLASSICAL
Dangermouse. Dude's really on a roll this year (not that he isn't usually). We've got the new Black Keys, Beck, and (duh) Gnarls Barkley. Three pretty disparate artists, three well-done albums.

BEST SHORT FORM MUSIC VIDEO
Weezer - Pork and Beans
Maybe I'm just a youtube junkie. I can recognize everyone in the video.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=muP9eH2p2PI&feature=channel[/youtube]


Best of luck to all the nominees. Hopefully I won't kill myself before the awards are over like I wanted to last year (at least, that is, until Amy Winehouse started winning and thanking her "Poor, incarcerated Blake").

I want to be remembered. Before I die, I want to do things. Lots of things. Things that I don't even know exist yet.

I want to go to a Radiohead concert, climb onstage, and lick Thom Yorke's lazy eye.

I want to climb the Empire State Building and then when I reach the top put on a monkey suit and run around screaming, "I'm the juggernaut, bitch!"

I want to actually read someone's mind. And find out that they still love the shitty pop-punk blink-182 crap they liked when they were 12, and then torment them about it.

I want to have a threesome with Iggy Pop and Lou Reed. While listening to David Bowie.

I wanna get a drumset and bang on it all night long.

I want to see some monkeys with a typewriter actually produce Shakespeare.

I want to see what would happen if the ghosts of Sid Vicious and Nancy Spungen were resurrected and put in the same room.

I want to find out if someone really can overdose on LSD or get addicted to weed.

I want to watch an episode of CSI: Miami that doesn't have that weird screaming thing at the beginning of the episode.

I want to watch a boxing match between Elliott Smith and Bob Dylan.

I want to switch my right hand onto my left wrist, and vice versa.

I want to eat a butterfly.

I want to be a better singer than Aretha Franklin, but with testicles.

I want to walk down the street and kiss everyone I see.

I want to share a tube of chapstick with the guys in New Order.

I want to draw a giant penis on Bono's forehead one night while he's sleeping. In Sharpie.

I want to transcend this life into the next. Whatever that may be. I don't even know if I believe in that shit. Probably not. I just know I want to do the impossible, break down some barriers, and shake up the fucking foundations. Are you in or are you out, motherfuckers?

It's the best kind...
This is sort of a list of the best live shows I've seen this year. Actually. This is more of a rundown of like, every show I've been to this year. If I can remember them all.

South By Southwest Music Festival
Austin, TX
March 14-16, 2008
Artists I Saw: Thurston Moore, J Mascis, Maps and Atlases, Yeasayer, Cheveu, Islands, and others
Premise: SXSW is a music conference that also hosts a music festival and a film festival in Austin, mostly along 6th Street and Red River. This was my third year going. Most of the shows are small and in clubs and bars, which can be a problem for me since I'm underage. Some cool places let you in. This festival takes a lot of planning and cab fare to get from place to place when you need to move around. To get in, you can either get a badge (levels of VIP treatment vary), a wristband (second priority to badges; what I always get), or just pay a door fee. Problem is, lines are so damn long sometimes you don't get in to shit. I missed MGMT and Vampire Weekend for that particular reason.
Highlights: My god. Thurston Moore! Thuuuuuurrrston Moore. So let me tell you the story. So I was thoroughly pissed about waiting for Vampire Weekend, just to get to the front of the line and have their set end WHEN I CAN SEE INSIDE. So my cousin Jeff who came with me decided we should just head over to this other bar nearby to wait for Thurston. We walk in, and suddenly I hear this beautiful noise. It sound like a dying parrot, but in a totally good way. I jump up on a barstool to be able to see, and lo and behold, J Mascis is shredding the fuck out of his guitar onstage. I honestly didn't know he would be there. It blew my mind. Now, as a HUUUUGE Sonic Youth fan, I waited patiently for my boy Thurston to come on. And he did in a major way. He played acoustic guitar and was accompanied by a violinist, another guitar player, a bassist, keyboardist, and Steve Shelly on the drums. He played mostly solo stuff from his new album Trees Outside The Academy, but he came on at the end and did a Velvet Underground B-side cover which I can't remember by name and a strange version of "Schizophrenia." Which made me happy. But halfway through the song, Thurston decides it would be fun to crowd surf. Apparently no one told him the kid in the front row was tiny, weak, and not able to carry a 6'6" man. (That kid would be me.) Helping me support Thurston's ass was a strangely tall Belgian photographer ("We must keep his butt off the ground! It is DIRTY!") It was slightly uncomfortable, but I got a mouthful of Thurston's sweaty, orange hair, I got to strum his guitar, and I got to be super-super close to one of my idols. Rock on.
Merchandise purchased: Went to Waterloo Records (I'd recommend it to anyone visiting Austin) and bought some old favorites on vinyl: Sonic Youth's self-titled debut, Dead Kennedys' Fresh Fruit for Rotting Vegetables, and The Velvet Underground's White Light/White Heat. I also got some stickers.


Nylon Magazine Tour
Houston, TX
May 18, 2008
Artists I Saw: The Switches, The Virgins, Be Your Own Pet (left before She Wants Revenge b/c I don't particularly care for Joy Division rip-offs)
Premise: So this is kind of sad. I only really went to this show because Radiohead (same night) sold out in a matter of a few hours. That depressed me so much... God. I hope they'll come back. Anyway. I love BYOP. I saw them at my first SXSW in 2006 playing a teensy show in front of oh, I dunno, 20 people (myself included).
Highlights: I met one of the guys from The Switches, who was really super nice and talked to me about Manchester and Factory Records for a while (the obsession never stops here). But moshing to BYOP was pretty fucking cool. I'm small (5'3") and not very tough. I also went to that particular show with my ex, who is very strong and very protective. He tried to stop the kids from bashing into me, but instead of accept his protection I kindly shoved him out of the way and continued partying. I also got to meet all of BYOP and they signed my record.
Merchandise Purchased: Be Your Own Pet gym shorts, Be Your Own Pet's self-titled debut album on vinyl.

The Cure North American Tour
June 9, 2008
Premises: I definitely forgot about this show until maybe the day or so before. Fortunately, I was able to score tickets on the side of the arena (close, but weird angle) for me and my boyfriend. We got there a little late, but just in time to catch one of everyone's personal Cure favorites: Lovesong.
Highlights: Oh shit... probably dancing to "In Between Days" (my favorite Cure song) along with about 5000 aging goths. Oh, and Robert Smith's hair. It's still hilarious.
Merchandise purchased: Cure T-shirt. Duh.

Austin City Limits Music Festival
Austin, TX
September 26-28, 2008
Artists I Saw: Beck, Fleet Foxes, MGMT, The Black Keys, José Gonzales, The Fratellis, The Kills, CSS
Premise: What a lovely 17th bday present! Thanks M&D. This trip was a nice escape from Post-Hurricane-Ike Houston. We still had no power when I left. When I returned, our power came back on. I went with some friends from school, including these kids:
Ben
Alex
and
Alexa
My friends Claire, Andrew, and Morgan were also in attendance.
Highlights: Honestly, I don't remember much. I was pretty stoned the whole time. But seeing Beck live was like a religious experience. I knew all the words to all the songs. And CSS, although I'm not a huge fan, put on an awesome live show, complete with confetti and floral unitards.
Merchandise purchased: The Black Keys' Attack and Release on CD, Waterloo records messenger bag, lots and lots of water, lots and lots of food, Beck shirt

Of Montreal Fall 08
With Icy Demons
November 12, 2008
Houston, TX
Premise: One of my all-time favorite bands. I saw them in Feb. 2007, after the release of Hissing Fauna, Are You the Destroyer? But this was different. This was awesome.
Highlights: All of it. Between the dancers, the coffin filled with shaving cream, the costumes, and Kevin Barnes being... Kevin Barnes, I have no clue what to pick.
Merchandise purchased: Of Montreal shirt, Skeletal Lamping on 180g vinyl

Wed 12 Nov – of Montreal


SHIT that was awesome.
More to come.