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  • Ray Ban Clubmaster REVIEWS!!!

    Abr 21 2011, 7h34



  • Vicevi o glazbenicima!!!!

    Mai 3 2008, 20h34

    1. "Momci, odlično ste svirali!"

    2. "...ostaćemo u kontaktu..."

    3. "...pare su Vam već uplaćene!"

    4. "On je izuzetno sposoban menadžer!"

    5. "Sve što Vam se trenutno ne dopada, ispravićemo u miksu!"

    P: Sto je predivna zena na ruci basista?
    O: tetovaza

    P: Koja je slicnost izmedju bubnjara i filozofa?
    O: obojica shvacaju vrijeme kao apstraktni koncept

    P: koja je razlika izmedju gitarista i jumbo pizze?
    O: pizza moze nahraniti obitelj

    P: koja je razlika izmedju mlaznjaka i trube?
    O: oko 3 decibela

    P: koja je razlika izmedju operne pjevacice i pit bulla?
    O: ruž za usne

    P: kako zoves gitarista koji zna samo dva akorda?
    O: glazbeni kriticar

    P: koja je razlika izmedju saxa i motorne pile?
    O: pilu mozes ustimati

    P: zasto su prsti violinista kao munja?
    O: rijetko pogode isto mjesto dva puta

    P: kako natjerati dva basista da sviraju unisono?
    O: ubij jednog

    P: kako natjerati gitarista da prestane svirati?
    O: daj mu note

    P: sta napravis ako pregazis basista autom?
    O: ubacis u riverc

    U toku je svirka.

    Bubnjar pita : "Koju cemo sada pjesmu svirati?"

    "Onu sto ti je prvi udaracac po dobosu", dobija odgovor.

    rechio klinac da uchi da svira bass gitaru.. i sad.. cimao caleta da mu uplati chasove, te ovaj iz ljubavi prema klincu to i uradi.. ode klinac na prvi chas.. vraca se posle chuku i po i cale ga pita kako je bilo.. klinac mu odgovara: 'Kul, uchio sam na prvoj zzici da sviram.. neke note mi dao i to..'

    dva dana kasnije, klinac ode na drugi chas i vraca se posle nekog vremena.. cale ga pita kako je i shta je uchio, a ovaj mu odgovara: 'evo, dobro.. uchili da sviramo na drugoj zzici, povezivali to sa prvom i tako'...

    klinac posle par dana ode na treci chas.. i nema ga.. neeema.. pao mrak.. proshlo dvanes'.. cale se izbezumio.. taman da zove muriju.. a klinac upada u kucu, onako dim od pljuga mu izlazi iz rukava od jakne josh uvek..

    Cale: "pa de si ti debilchino jedna? znash kolko sam se uplashio? jesi normalan bre?"
    klinac: "Ma pusti me cale.. umoran sam mnogo.. zaglavio na svirci vecheras.. jedva stojim.."


    rijesio bubnjar da se baci u narodnjake i oce da uzme harmoniku.

    udje u ducan sa instrumentima i prodavac ga uputi na dio gdje su harmonike.

    i prodje jedno pola sata razgledavanja, kad evo ti njega k prodavacu:

    evo, svidja mi se ona velika crvena u kutu.

    prodavac ga pogleda i pita, jeli, ti si bubnjar, zar ne?


    da, kako znas?


    ona velika crvena harmonika je radijator...


    Doktor: "M-da... Ozbiljan problem, vidim... Recite mi, da li d*k@te?"

    Gitarista: "MOLIM?!? Ja... ovaj... pa, jeste, pomalo... da... Zašto?"

    Doktor: "I ja takođe! Moćna stvar, a?"

    Basista: "Dobar dan želim. Mogu li da kupim jednog kombo-Ampega i Fenderov Presižn, moliću?"


    Trgovac: "A, vi mora da ste basista. Jesam li u pravu..?"

    Basista: "Ka... Kako ste samo pogodili?!"

    Trgovac: "Lako. Ovo je mesara".
  • The Differences in Metal

    Mai 2 2008, 11h54

    HEAVY METAL
    The protagonist arrives on a harley, kills the dragon, drinks a few beers and fucks the princess.

    POWER METAL
    The protagonist arrives riding a white unicorn, escapes from the dragon, saves the princess and makes love to her in an enchanted forest.

    THRASH METAL
    The protagonist arrives, fights the dragon, saves the princess and fucks her.

    FOLK METAL
    The protagonist arrives with some friends playing acordions, violins, flutes and many more weird instruments, the dragon falls asleep (because of all the dancing). Then all leave...without the princess.

    VIKING METAL
    The protagonist arrives in a ship, kills the dragon with his mighty axe, skins the dragon and eats it, rapes the princess to death, steals her belongings and burns the castle before leaving.

    DEATH METAL
    The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon, fucks the princess and kills her, then leaves.

    BLACK METAL
    The protagonist arrives at midnight, kills the dragon and impales it in front of the castle. Then he sodomizes the princess, drinks her blood in a ritual before killing her. Then he impales the princess next to the dragon.

    GRIND METAL
    The protagonist arrives, screams something completely undecipherable for about 2 minutes and then leaves...

    DOOM METAL
    The protagonist arrives, sees the size of the dragon and thinks he could never beat him, then he gets depressed and commits suicide. The dragon eats his body and the princess as dessert. That's the end of the sad story.

    GOTHIC METAL
    The princess in a velvet costume starts singing soprano. The protagonist completes the duett by adding the beast part, while the dragon plays the flute. Suddenly he swallows up the pipe and accidently scorches the beauty and the beast and suffocates to death. All their souls are damned in hell's eternity.

    PROGRESSIVE METAL
    The protagonist arrives with a guitar and plays a solo of 26 minutes. The dragon kills himself out of boredom. The protagonist arrives to the princess' bedroom, plays another solo with all the techniques and tunes he learned in the last year of the conservatory. The princess escapes looking for the Heavy Metal protagonist.

    INDUSTRIAL METAL
    The protagonist arrives wearing greasy overcoat, makes an obscene gestures towards dragon, and gets escorted out of fairy tale land by security guards.

    SPEED METAL
    Suddenly there, short solo, dragon is confused, someone's screaming weird stuff, princess realizes she's been deflowered, dragon and princess are still looking for the one who did this.

    CHRISTIAN METAL
    The protagonist rides in on his way home from church and sings a mushy power ballad to the dragon about how much Jesus loves him and that the dragon should turn to Him. The Dragon is immediately converted, and when the princess wants to 'thank' the protagonist he replies, "Sorry, but I don't believe in having sex before marriage."

    GLAM METAL
    The protagonist arrives, the dragon laughs at the guy's appearance and lets him enter. He steals the princess' make up and tries to paint the castle in a beautiful pink color.

    BATTLE METAL
    The protagonist arrives with a legion of a hundred brave footman, war chariots and a dozen elite warriors and, as a master tactician, flanks the dragon in a bloody siege that lasts six hours. The princess gets bored.

    NU METAL
    The protagonist arrives in a run down Honda Civic and attempts to fight the dragon but he burns to death when his moronic baggy clothes catch fire.

    EMO
    The protagonist sees the dragon and moans about how hard it will be to get the princess to fall in love with him, he gets eaten. The princess
    is very happy, because he was a whiny fag anyway.
  • Misli 21. stoljeca!!!

    Mar 18 2008, 15h51

    Brinite se nista nece biti u redu!!!!!!!!!
    Pesimist je optimist s iskustvom!!!!!!!!!!!
    Ne postoji srodna dusa,sam je pravis!!!!!!!
    Bolje cijeli zivot zivjeti kao bogatas nego sedam dana kao siromah!!!!!!
    Kad sve zbrojim dodje mi da se oduzmem!!!!!