demonic demise disgusting disguise deceiving demons drowning diseases distant detours disarraying denials dilated dis-allusions depicting dreams of dim dirty dis-comfortable deaths……..

Finding Serenity

I got to the Salvation Army late and they were out of mats, so I was shoved into the chapel to sleep on the floor; being drunk, I passed out immediately. I woke up around 4 am feeling something wet on my leg, and had rolled into a pool of someone else's urine. “Oh my god!” I screamed. I was too drunk to care, so I rolled the other direction and went back to sleep. When they kicked us out it was below zero, and my leg was still wet with urine. As I walked to Catholic Charities…

Why… must I… stick my head… in the sky?
and why… will I worry… about… going dry?
Stop to think… then I need a drink… as she caresses me on my thigh
No it's not what you think, it's just a dream, I need to be waken, before I die!
So won't you come with me, take my hand you'll see, the reason why I cry…

I want some… I need some…. want some…. some more
I need some… breathe some… take some… but what for?

To keep my mind at ease, please lord please, I think I'm falling, out…

dirty despicable dreams as it seems drives you deeper onto your knees when the wind seeps into your drowning brain leaving you swiftly and with no pain to darken everything as you may scream help me my wretched beings why me and when will i get to be the one who gets to push the fucking button bam! mother fucker bam! so let the fire consume me and the water wash me away from this dark wonderful place as I sink into the depths of my thoughts thinking of nothing and remembering everything…… where in the fuck did that come…

I've got chain grease in my brain - I'm going insane
I'm losing my mind today….
Chain grease in my brain - I'm goin insane
I'm losing my mind today….

Because my insides are un-oiled
my insides are un-oiled
I said my insides are un-oiled
insides are un-oiled

So I push the needle in my vein - just to drive it away
and lose again today
I said I push the needle in my vein - just to drive it away
and lose again today

Now I'm in too deep - there's too much oil
in too deep - too…

There's a hole in the middle of my soul that lacks the self control to make my mind think straight. And I've got a third eye that's blinded by my mind. Why when I open up my eyes I cannot see what lies in front of me. And why can't I be alive, content, and happy?

chorus:

Because I'm coming down! yes I'm crashing
I need another round, before I'm smashing
everything around me, and everything inside of me
everything I want to be, everything that sets me free….

When thinking becomes an enemy, my thoughts then rise up against…