Sexta-feira 15 Jun 2012, 5h:53

"How much do you think I should take?"
'Please don't kill yourself'
"How much do you think?"
'I don't know. I'd guess… ten? What were you thinking of?'
"I don't know. It feels really bad. 6 or 8?"
'Fucking hell. I was just joking when I said ten. Four. At most. Hold on - at least let me look it up….
… you still there?'
"Yeah"
'Okay, well, it looks like there really isn't a safe overdose. Four.'
"I've already taken four."
'Well.. shit. Don't take any more. I guess the good thing is that you're meant to throw it up if you overdose, generally, aren't you?'
"Well - Sylvia Plath."
'You're at home right?'
"Yeah"
'How's Tarquin?'
"Oh he's gorgeous. He's just — gorgeous. My most reliable friend. Oi moi, my father stumbled in on him in his full glory not all that long ago. I'm still reliving the shame."
'A true tragedy.'
"A true Jane Austen moment in all its synthaesthetic gorgeousity"
'Whilst I approve wholeheartedly of your turn of phrase - you do know that what you mentioned earlier is a really fucking stupid idea, right? Please don't take any more'
"I'm going to anyway, so you might as well look up what's safe."
'Pretty sure if you've already been drinking and - let's be honest, you've been drinking a lot for the last few months at least. Well. Six can kill you. Seriously. Don't do it.'
"I'll be fine. I'm finally immortal"
'That's not really immortality, is it, though? That's - what - two hundred people who don't know you who might read it, and maybe five of them will remember your name for a little while. The only ones who you'll be immortal for are your friends, and we'd remember you anyway. Look, just go to bed.'
"So - another six for a Sylvia Plath moment?"
'Actually, if you've already taken that many, I'd suggest you make yourself throw up before you go to bed.'
"oh fuck off, mother."
'I only say it because I love you, you know'
"Of course I know that. I love you too."
The last line thick, as through drink, but full of love.

She never rang back.

Eventually, I found out, she took ten.

I don't remember the date, but I remember that I was never that worried about her.