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(i don't have a job anymore...)


1. What would you say to number 2 band's members if you could?
Norther
i'd problably say welcome to aleksi and that i desperately need to hear new stuff from them.

2. Is there a song by 22 that never seems to get boring?
Carnal Forge
numb (the dead). one of my favorites in general.

3. What do you think is special about number 18?
myGRAIN
clean/harsh vocals fit perfecly.

4. Is there a song by 41 that makes you hungry?
Black Sabbath
o.O no

5. What is your favorite album by 45?
Chthonian
of beatings and the silence in between (that was easy, it's the only one lol)

6. What is your favorite band member from 15?
Children of Bodom
henkka <3

7. What is your favorite guitar solo (or any other instrumental part if the band doesn't use guitars) by 44?
Mors Principium Est
i love every solo from liberation=termination but "the oppressed will rise" has my favorite guitar solo. i also love the drum beginning in "cleansing rain".

8. What is your least favorite song by 43?
The 69 Eyes
everything after devils. i only listen to old 69 eyes.

9. Is there anything scary about number 50?
Control Denied
i don't think so. (my mom disagrees)

10. Is there a song by 6 that could describe your personality or character?
Nevermore
all of them. lol.

11. What is the most important thing for which you like number 9?
Bloodbath
brutality with melody and rhymes and lyrics that fit perfectly. everything.

12. What song do you think works as number 37's "face"?
Soilwork
i don't know, they have many "faces". i guess my favorite is "neurotica rampage", though.

13. What is the first song you've heard by 39?
Skid Row
youth gone wild (of course)

14. Is there a song by 32 that helped you to make an important decision?
Decrepit Birth
no.

15. What is your favorite song name by 7?
Testament
DNR (do not resuscitate)

16. How did you discover number 40?
Edge of Sanity
they're related to bloodbath...

17. What do you dislike about number 5?
Arsis
they stood me up (lol) on carcass tour. (they were supposed to open up but dropped off)

18. What was the first song you've heard by 21?
Mercenary
my world is ending

19. Would you like to be a member of band number 16?
Anata
i couldn't because they're gods. but in my imaginary world yes, why not?

20. Choose 3 currently favorite songs by 1.
Carcass
1. corporal jigsore quandary
2. no love lost
3. can't pick just one more.

21. Why do you like number 10?
Katatonia
i guess it's the band that best expresses my usual mood. everything else is too agitated.

22. Any funny experience related with number 12?
Necrophagist
no...

23. What is your least favorite song by 35?
Hypocrisy
too many least favorites. in fact i only really like the album "virus".

24. Do you have any complaints for number 26?
Kalmah
absolutely not

25. How many albums by 13 do you own?
Insomnium
5 (all of them)

26. What is your favorite song by 20?
Jethro Tull
bourée

27. Do you prefer melody or vocal by 30?
Sadus
melody. bass lines to be more specific.

28. Do you have any ideas for number 17 relating their music?
Amoral
i don't. at first because they were perfect. now because it's hopeless.

29. What is your favorite album artwork by 36?
Obscura
cosmogenesis (music and artwork)

30. What is the most memorable experience you have related to number 34?
Disarmonia Mundi
nothing special...

31. What did you think about number 42 when you first heard them?
Type O Negative
i hated it because it was "black number one". then i heard "slow, deep and hard" and other older albums and it grew in me.

32. When did you discover number 7?
Testament
few years ago, no idea how, probably through myspace...

33. What songs by 1 are masterpieces according to you?
Carcass
i think the whole "swansong" album because it is absolutey unique.

34. Do you know anything interesting or unusual about number 24?
Sinamore
no...

35. Is there a song by 37 that makes you laugh?
Soilwork
yeah, many songs... follow the hollow, for example...

36. What is the most important song for you by 4?
The Haunted
many are but "abysmal" is the best i think

37. What was the first song you really liked by 11?
Evergrey
a touch of blessing. it was the first i heard and i couldn't stop listening to it.

38. Is there a song by 38 that you could describe as "bad, but very good"?
DÅÅTH
i guess "dead on the dancefloor". i used to skip it then i heard it to the end and fell in love with it lol

39. Have you ever seen number 7 live?
Testament
yes, twice :D

40. What is the most memorable song for you by 31?
Sadus
cursed

41. What are the weirdest lyrics you know by 14?
Quo Vadis
nothing too weird i guess...

42. Is there an album by 3 which contains only great songs for you?
Opeth
all of them i think. but my favorite is damnation.

43. What is your least favorite album artwork by 23?
Sentenced
the only one i like is "down". the other ones are totally unimpressive.

44. Is there a band that you think would make a great dual-band with number 19? Which and why?
Daylight Dies
Slumber is very similar. Swallow the Sun would be a good pair.

45. What are your favorite lyrics by 11?
Evergrey
"broken wings" and "these scars" are perfect.

46. If you had to choose one album which number 1 would have to delete from their discography, which one would you choose?
Carcass
reek of putrefaction

47. Is there a song by 25 that you always seem to hum in your mind?
Death
nope...

48. What was the very first band and song you liked? Do you still listen to them now?
first one that i really loved and bought cds and stuff was Silverchair, song was probably "freak". i still listen to them every once in a while.

49. What is your favorite song of all time?
that changes according to my mood but i think it's "only ash remains" by necrophagist.

50. What is your favorite album of all time?
i have at least 5 favorite albums of all time.
Swansong (carcass), The Great Cold Distance (katatonia), A Celebration of Guilt(arsis), Epitaph (necrophagist), Since the Day it All Came Down (insomnium)...

Progressive Radio

!T.O.O.H.! // A.C.T // Abydos // Adagio // Adramelch // Age of Silence // Aghora // Aghora // Alchemist // Alchemist // Alchemist // Alchemist // Amorphis // Amorphis // Amorphis // Amorphis // Anacrusis // Anacrusis // Andromeda // Andromeda // Apotheosis // Arcturus // Arcturus // Arjen Anthony Lucassen's Star One // Arjen Anthony Lucassen's Star One // Ark // Ark // Atheist // Atheist // Atheist // Atrox // Augury // Axamenta // Ayreon // Ayreon // Ayreon // Ayreon // Ayreon // Becoming the Archetype // Between the Buried and Me // Between the Buried and Me // Beyond Twilight // Beyond Twilight // Blotted Science // Borknagar // Borknagar // Borknagar // Borknagar // Burst // Carcariass // Carnival in Coal // Circus Maximus // Circus Maximus // Communic // Communic // Conception // Conception // Conception // Control Denied // Coprofago // Crimson Glory // Cynic // Cynic // Dan Swanö // Dark Suns // Devin Townsend // Devin Townsend // Devin Townsend // Devin Townsend // Devin Townsend // Devin Townsend // Diabolical Masquerade // Disillusion // Disillusion // Dream Theater // Dream Theater // Dream Theater // Dream Theater // Dream Theater // Dream Theater // Edge of Sanity // Edge of Sanity // Emperor // Enslaved // Enslaved // Enslaved // Enslaved // Enslaved // Enslaved // Ephel Duath // Ephel Duath // Evergrey // Evergrey // Evergrey // Evergrey // Evergrey // Extol // Extol // Farmakon // Farmakon // Fates Warning // Fates Warning // Fates Warning // Fates Warning // Fates Warning // Fates Warning // Fates Warning // Fear of God // Fleurety // Frantic Bleep // Freak Kitchen // Freak Kitchen // Freak Kitchen // Freak Kitchen // Fredrik Thordendal // Gojira // Gordian Knot // Green Carnation // Green Carnation // Green Carnation // Hacride // Hammers of Misfortune // Hammers of Misfortune // Hammers of Misfortune // Hammers of Misfortune // Ihsahn // Ihsahn // In Mourning // In the Woods... // In the Woods... // In Vain // Indukti // Insomnium // Into Eternity // Intronaut // Isis // Jason Becker // Jeff Loomis // Joe Satriani // John Petrucci // Kalisia // King's X // Kobong // Kobong // Lethal // Liquid Tension Experiment // Liquid Tension Experiment // Madder Mortem // Madder Mortem // Madder Mortem // Mastodon // Mastodon // Mastodon // Mattias Eklundh // maudlin of the Well // maudlin of the Well // maudlin of the Well // Mechanical Poet // Mekong Delta // Meshuggah // Meshuggah // Meshuggah // Meshuggah // Meshuggah // Misanthrope // Ne Obliviscaris // Negura Bunget // Nightingale // Nightingale // Novembre // Novembre // Novembre // Novembre // Novembre // Novembre // Oceans of Sadness // On the Virg // Opeth // Opeth // Opeth // Opeth // Opeth // Opeth // Opeth // Opeth // Orphaned Land // OSI // Pagan's Mind // Pagan's Mind // Pain of Salvation // Pain of Salvation // Pain of Salvation // Pain of Salvation // Pain of Salvation // Pan.Thy.Monium // Peccatum // Persefone // Pestilence // Phlebotomized // Phlebotomized // Psychotic Waltz // Psychotic Waltz // Psychotic Waltz // Psychotic Waltz // Queensrÿche // Queensrÿche // Queensrÿche // Rage // Ram // Ram // Redemption // Redemption // Riverside // Riverside // Royal Hunt // Royal Hunt // Ruins // Ruins // Sculptured // Sculptured // Seventh Wonder // Seventh Wonder // Shadow Gallery // Shadow Gallery // Shadow Gallery // Shaman // Sieges Even // Sieges Even // Sieges Even // Sieges Even // Sigh // Sigh // Sigh // Sigh // SikTh // SikTh // Sleepytime Gorilla Museum // Solefald // Solefald // Solefald // Solefald // Sólstafir // Spastic Ink // Spastic Ink // Spheric Universe Experience // Spiral Architect // Strapping Young Lad // Stream of Passion // Stream of Passion // Subterranean Masquerade // Suspyre // Suspyre // Symbyosis // Symphony X // Symphony X // Symphony X // Symphony X // Symphony X // Textures // Textures // The Black Mages // The Deserts of Träun // The Postman Syndrome // The Provenance // Therion // Thought Industry // Threshold // Threshold // Threshold // Threshold // Threshold // Threshold // Thy Catafalque // Tiamat // Time of Orchids // TO // Tool // Týr // Týr // Unexpect // Unmoored // Vanden Plas // Vanden Plas // Various Artists // Vauxdvihl // Ved Buens Ende // Vintersorg // Vintersorg // Voivod // Voivod // Voivod // Voivod // Watchtower // Watchtower // Winds // Winds // Wolverine // Wuthering Heights // Wuthering Heights // Yakuza // Zebulon Pike // Zero Hour

inyourpocket87's top albums (overall)
1. Opeth - Damnation (298) 2. David Sylvian - Gone to Earth (disc 2) (276) 3. Raul Midón - State of Mind (239) 4. Cocteau Twins - Heaven or Las Vegas (199) 5. The Killers - Day & Age (157) 6. Control Denied - The Fragile Art of Existence (153) 7. Death - Human (144) 8. Wiz Khalifa - Star Power (130) 9. Death - The Sound of Perseverance (118) 10. Death - Individual Thought Patterns (114) 11. Spacetime Continuum - Sea Biscuit (113) 12. Opeth - Blackwater Park (111) 13. Fen - The Malediction Fields (100) 14. Black Star - Mos Def & Talib Kweli Are Black Star (92) 15. Lamb of God - Wrath (91) 16. David Sylvian - Gone to Earth (disc 1) (90) 17. ColdWorld - Melancholie² (89) 18. Beneath the Massacre - Evidence of Inequity (85) 19. Imogen Heap - Speak for Yourself (80) 20. Between the Buried and Me - Colors (79)

Frost* - “No Me No You”
Jethro Tull – “Moths”
Andromeda – “Worst Enemy”
Kaipa – “Notes From the Past (Part 1)”
Andrew Gorczyca – “Peasant Under Class”
Control Denied – “Cut down”
The Lens – “Frost and Fire”
Black Bonzo – “Giant Games”
Litmus – “Stars”
Rush – “Resist”
Fugue – “Telemachus”
Cynic – “Nunc Stans”

Here is another from my Last.fm journal archives. I'm gonna post one a day until I run out and I'll write brand new journals. This was written on December 13, 2005. Here is the original one, unedited and with no omissions!

The most important figure in death metal

13 Dec 2005, 01:26

Chuck Schuldiner wrote brilliant music and was extemely talented. Without him, I would not be into death metal. When I first listened to Death a year before Chuck's passing, a new realm opened up for me. A friend got me into this band, they were his favorite at the time. I knew about death metal, but I was not familiar with the roots of it. This was in 2000 or 1999, I think 1999... I met this guy on the net (well not really, I knew him outside the net, but we truly met online) and I go over to his house. It turned out we were both musicians and so we jammed. I'm a guitarist and he's a drummer/guitarist. Anyway, he played some Death for me one day and I was enthralled by the sound.

Around 2001, I found out that Chuck was very ill. I think he was before 2001, I just wasn't really informed. I was just getting into his music and all of a sudden I'm shocked at the fact that he passed away. On X-mas day (a while after his death), I got my first Death albums. Ever since then, I've managed to find any album by Death.


Control Denied was a band I never got into. I never gave them a good listen and I'll be getting the album they only have so far. I heard that another one was going to be released, but I think the release date was pushed back or it may never get released at all. I'm not sure...

R.I.P. Chuck.

Well, I have been listening to Metal for some years now and I can say that i like most of its sub-genres with some exceptions (Power Metal is pretty gay from my point of view and I don´t consider Nu Metal, Metalcore or that other bunge of "-core" garbage as real Metal).
I enjoy Thrash Metal and Death Metal, especially old school death metal and the more progressive / technical side of Death Metal, the most. Just for the case if you´re interested, I think this represents my musical taste very well.
Though I like this kind of extreme music I can honestly say that I never really got into Black Metal.
I haven´t heard any good Black Metal metal which has blown me away or where I thought "Oh my God, this shit is fuckin´ amazing...". The only things Black Metal could call my attention with were scandals and crimes but not with their music.
At the beginning of the 90s there were dozens of churches burning in Norway, various murders with Varg Vikernes killing Euronymus as most famous example, acts of humiliation and torture commited by Black Metallers, it is said that bandmembers bury their clothes for months to achieve an disgusting stench for their concerts or that they stick the heads of decapitated goats on piles in front of the stage.
My favourite scandal: A member of Mayhem took a shotgun blowjob. Guess what his bandmembers did! Right! A TRVE Norwegian Black Metaller takes photos of his dead buddy with his fragmented head and blood and brain spilled all over the floor and uses it for his next album cover. That´s TRVE NORSK ARYSK BLACK METAL. RAAAHHHH!
The whole scene is just seems to be too obscure for me...

Just look at these silly faces:













Do you get my point?
I mean: Why do they take tons of make-up in their faces. Do they want to look more evil, TRVE or more br00tal or whatever? I don´t get it. From my point of view their whole appearance is far from evil, it´s just totally ridiculous and stupid.
And then their clothes. With all those leather stuff and the exaggerted nails on arms and legs they look more like a bunch of homosexuals with sado-masochistic preferences.






And it keeps going on.
What for hell´s sake do they want to intend with these silly toy imitations of medieval weapons? 3 of 4 Band pictures i have seen so far have contained a stupid sword or axe.
C´mon, we´re living in the 21st century. You hardly can scare anybody with your little axe, Abbath. It looks more like you crapped your own pants



Why do Black Metallers always strike so theatric and dramatic poses?
I have never seen a Thrash or Death Metal band doing this so far...
Here´s another one:



I think most of you know this picture because it´s probably the most hilarious I´ve ever seen. It´s so fuckin´ ridiculous that it has been photoshopped many times so you can find these wonderful outcomes all over the internet:













EDIT: Three masterpieces done by myself:

"Would you like to take a little sightseeing-tour in the bathroom?
Well here we have the process of creating a Black Metal album..."



30 seconds later:




Some important personalities:

1) Abbath (Immortal) (I think you already know him)







"I want you for gay butt sex!"
"I want you to vote for me!"



Abbath Doom Occulta guitarist and vocalist for the Black Metal band Immortal has announced his candidacy for the President of The United States of America. In a move that shocked the enitre metal community Abbath has vowed to emerge from the Black Metal underground and form a Bi-Partisan partnership to resolve the growing economic crisis that faces this great Nation. Abbath has also vowed as the headline above shows to end Global warming which will in turn eliminate the need for wasteful "pork barreled spending and other ear marks". Upon news of this John McCain remarked "this reminds me of the when I was a young Senator when Regan was in office". While Barrak Obama replied "hey I'm a Senator too". The Abbath campaign has not yet released the list of potential candidates for Vice President but experts have compiled a list of possibilites which includes known republican and NRA supporter Ted Nugent. The potential selection of Nugent shows that Abbath is also for Hope and Change and ready to cross party lines to make America great again.
Source
Oh! The Scales fell from my eyes! This is obviously the final solution for every problem humanity has to face: Turning the whole world into a grymm and frostbitten Norway....




2) Gaahl (Gorgoroth) (the most evil man alive...)














3) Varg Vikernes (Burzum)



Tightest Gangsta in da hood breakdancing:



Cunt... uhhh... I mean Count Grishnackh loves kittens...



His extraordinary hobbies:




Some random crap







I think only Germans can understand this:











EDIT²: Added the following 3 pics

Here we have an extremely rare and shy specimen ov a Black Metaller, encountered in its natural habitat, the icy, cold and frostbitten landscapes in the Northest ov the North...




Translated into English:
"Daddy?"
"Get the fuck out..."

The Lord ov Epik Grymness doing some unholy, blasphemik, christraping, goatworshipping rituals in the dark, forgotten woods of Transsylvania...





Now I think it´s time for some videoclips...

The 10 most ridiculous Black Metal pics of all time

The 10 most ridiculous Black Metal videos

Well, isn´t Dark Kirchensteuer the KVLTest bandname evah...?
I enjoyed #2 the most, so here´s the full-length version:

Immortal - The Call Of The Wintermoon

Holy Shit! How can you take these guys serious?
Everytime I watch this video I have to ask myself: What the hell did they think when they shot this clip. This is just hilarious.
It looks like some children dressed as magicians playing "hide and seek" in the woods during carneval.

For those who can´t get enough from this piece of art, here´s a liitle remix
And another one

Omg, i fell from the chair because of laughing when I saw this scene:



Abbath is really a passionate dancer

EDIT²:
Here´s a totally hilarious article from Uncyclopedia about Black Metal that complements my article perfectly.
some excerpts:
[...]Instead of saying "this album was recorded in 2008", say "this abomination was infernally necrospawned from the pandemonic womb of Sathanas in anno MMVIII". You could also make everything sound self-deprecating, like "this noise was vomited forth from the smelly cunt ov Lilith" or include songs that are nothing but the lead singer urinating.[...]

[...]It is very important that you do not utilise ordinary grammar and spelling. In DER BLAKK MEHTVL SPE4K, those are secondary, while DER GRYMMNEZ of DER SPEVK is fundamental. Never say DER Norsk Arisk Blækk Mettal when you can say DER Fvkking Tr00 and Kvlt Grymm Nekro Norsk Arysk Blækk Mettal. [...]

[...]And Finally...

“Excuse all the blood”

~ Dead on being dead

Kill yourself, leaving an apology note for firing a gun indoors and a gruesome scene that, if discovered before their stabbing contest, could be photographed and used later as a bootleg album cover by the rest of the surviving members, after they've finished eating your brains off of the ceiling.

Have fun!
[...]
EDIT³:
Another amazing article about Black Metal found on Encyclopedia Dramatica

If you also want to become tr00 KVLT and start your own BM band but you can´t find an appropriate band name, check out Spitfire´s Frostbitten Band Name Generator of DOOM
Why not use
"The Enslaved Void of Frostbitten Shadows" ,
"Unknown Lifeless Corpses of Entombed Funerals" ,
"Haunted Warfares of Old Forgotten Mountains" ,
"Transylvanian Commands of Painful Wraths"
"The Satanic Spell That Turns You Into a Satanic Bible of the Burning Memory"
or my personal favourite:
"Homosexual Gaahl's Rainbowcolored Hellbirds of the Unknown Hell Journey"
Yeah, I know they´re not as KVLT as " Dark Kirchensteuer" but who actually cares...

The Black Metal Dialogues

Dave Hill is obsessed with Norwegian Black Metal, the exciting musical genre brought to international prominence in the early '90's thanks to a series of church burnings, murders, suicides, and other surefire attention-getting devices.
Recently his desire to become part of the scene reached such a fever pitch that he couldn't help but reach out to a longtime member of the Norwegian Black Metal community. (Mysticum)
Fearing for his own life however, he wrote to him not as himself but as his alter ego- a 19 year-old kid from Gary, Indiana named Lance, frontman, leader, and sole member of the self-proclaimed greatest Black Metal band ever, Witch Taint.
The following is their unaltered e-mail correspondence.

Little excerpt:
---------------------------------------------------------
Friday, March 25, 2005 3:40 PM
FROM: MrLouRawls@aol..com
TO: saiihtam (e-mail address removed)
SUBJECT: Witch Taint Rising

dear saiihtam,

alas, it has been a while since we've spoken. i write to you from a state of blackness that is blacker than anything even i have ever experienced before. and that means a lot coming from me, the king of black metal and about 50 other fucking things. anyway, i wanted to give you an update on the latest happenings with witch taint and our upcoming release on your label. i'm sorry for not sending you any new mp3's. since our last correspondence, i fired everyone in the band and got in a huge fight with my mom so she wouldn't let me hold auditions in the basement for like a month until i did some bullshit around the house for her. anyway, the time off has done me well. the music i am writing right now is the most evil and blackest music ever recorded in my humble opinion. i realize pretty much no one but me could even handle it (and believe me, i can barely take it myself), but i look forward to unleashing the unholy taint on the willing. how are things with you? really black i hope. what is the latest with mysticum? i am still very much interested in using them as my backing band when i come to norway. speaking of which, can you recommend any venues where i might set up shows? preferably, i would like to perform in a forest or a cave, but i suppose i would need to rent a generator for this. do you think one of the guys in mysticum could take care of this? please let me know. also, i would like to do some shows with mayhem if possible. since it's witch taint's first time in norway, i would be happy to open for them. i will be sending you new mp3's soon. please make sure any pets or sharp objects are out of the room before listening.

blacker than the blackest of the black,
lance, the king of black metal now and forever

------------------------------------------------------------------



OK, this journal has become even longer than I expected so I´m going to finish here.

Now, start bitching around about my music taste and my opinion and start those endless discussions about different metal genres and Tr00ness.



Edit³: June 17th 2009: 100 comments reached in only 5 days

The Nuclear Blast UK Street Team are about to start up again this summer, and we're looking for new members to join us in pushing the bands we all love on the label.

If anyone is interested in joining the Nuclear Blast UK Street Team, then please send an email to nbukst@live.co.uk telling us why you want to sign up.

After Forever, Agathodaimon, Agnostic Front, All Shall Perish, Amorphis, Arsis, AudioBook, Augury, Avantasia, Bal-Sagoth, Behemoth, Belphegor, Benediction, Blackguard, Bleed the Sky, Bleeding Through, Blind Guardian, Bludgeon, Callejón, Candlemass, Cathedral, Chimaira, Chrome Division, Clawfinger, Coldseed, Communic, Control Denied, Darkane, Death, Death Angel, Deathstars, Decapitated, Decrepit Birth, Defecation, Demonoid, The Destiny Program, Dew-Scented, Die Apokalyptischen Reiter, Dimmu Borgir, Dissection, Divinity, Echoes of Eternity, Edguy, Eluveitie, Epica, Equilibrium, Ex Deo, Exodus, Fireball Ministry, Gorefest, Gotthard, Graveworm, Hackneyed, HammerFall, Hardcore Superstar, Hypocrisy, I, Immortal, In Flames, Kataklysm, Keep of Kalessin, Korpiklaani, The Kovenant, Malevolent Creation, Mantic Ritual, Melechesh, Meshuggah, Mnemic, Mortification, Nightwish, Nile, One Man Army and the Undead Quartet, Pain, Psycroptic, Rage, Ride the Sky, Samael, Scar Symmetry, Sinergy, Sirenia, Soilwork, Sonata Arctica, Sonic Syndicate, Subway to Sally, Success Will Write Apocalypse Across The Sky, Suffocation, Swashbuckle, Sylosis, Tapping the Vein, Tarot, Testament, The 69 Eyes, The Abyss, The Accüsed, The Crinn, Therion, Threat Signal, Threshold, Thunderstone, Tiamat, Voivod, Vader, Wintersun

thats right everybody, i, the magnificent some guy, am counting down the dreamiest heads of hair in all of metal. this could very well be the dreamiest journal ever, so lets stop wasting time here and sink our teeth into the dreaminess

oh and one more thing, in the title, homo-eroticism, is that one word, 2 words, or was my hyphen usage correct?

starting off the list we have a guy who has lots of bands (many of them involve pretty girls, actually come to think of it almost all of them do). he is totally a player, and his name is quite fun to say (although im not sure im pronouncing it correctly). thats right everybody, we have, arjen anthony lucassen.



such a playa, anneke , floor and simone are real qtpies

next up is another brilliant musician with amazing hair. i wonder what kind of shampoo he used? what kind of conditioner? it’s a shame we’ll never know, rip chuck shuldiner



im pretty sure you (yes you, the bored person reading this) are thinking that this is obviously the work of a homosexual. this is not true I love girls especially pretty ones like the person who comes in third place. shes in fact so pretty that she may have been mentioned before in this very list. yes yes, you can probably figure it out. in third place is simone simons



oh how id like to hold that in my arms on a lonely night, quietly ask her if I could sing her a power metal love song, and then she says yes and oh it would be the mos

ok enough about my sick fantasies and back to the list

here in second place is a man whos dreamy hair i did not notice until recently. my one and only internet stalker would never shut up about how hot this man is, and well, I suppose i kinda agree. his long blonde hair is just soo dreamy, and well after seeing this picture on this one pretty girl who has super compatibility with me and seems to show up everywhere on this site’s profile sealed this mans spot at #2. the award for the second dreamiest hair in metal goes to, jonas renske! hes the blond guy in case you can't tell




the one you have been waiting for (i can read your mind so i know what you have been waiting for). the dreamiest hair in metal. whew im hyperventilating here, time to calm down some guy. this mans hair is so dreamy that if it could be compared to my greatness it would be nearly equal. and that is saying a lot ladies and gentlemen. oh wow im getting all hot and bothered here. just staring at this picture makes my straight heart go “go gay so you can touch this”. im just going to say it.

mikael akerfeld



HONRABLE MENTIONS:

jon schaffer + hansi kursh:

schaffer is kind of a scary looking fellow imagine running into him in a dark ally would be scary

<your choice here>

see a person in a metal band with dreamy hair who isnt here? post pics!


and now a giant list of bands that these fellows and hot chick are involved in (and also the only capital letters in this entire journal)



Opeth
Katatonia
Bloodbath
Death
Ayreon
Epica
October Tide
Star One
Jonas Renske
Mikael Åkerfeldt
Ambeon
Stream of Passion
Control Denied
Demons & Wizards
Blind Guardian
Iced Earth
Chuck Shuldiner
Arjen Anthony Lucassen
Simone Simons

umm, did i miss any?