If I could be surgically attached to an electronic device, it would be my PHONE. I'm no SMS junkie, but I do enjoy chatting on free Vodafone minutes, mainly because my dad is on contract with Vodafone as an IBM systems analyst and he has committed a cardinal sin against his offspring, of which he does not intend to redeem himself with an act of penance anytime soon.
Being the stereotypically cheap evil asian he is, he has played around with the custom settings of my account using his Vodafone permissions, and since 2004, I have been living off an obscurely created prepaid account that gives me $20 over 4 years, or more precisely $5 for every 365 days.
I'll do the math for you. That works out to be 1+2/3 texts a month.
And though it shits me to no end that I have to forever collect free Voda-to-Voda minutes to prevent my social life from becoming officially defunct, it's not what I want to talk about today.
Apart from free Vodafone texts and minutes, I also collect a lot of (to others) perceived useless shit which are of sentimental value to me. My long-term hoarding has included stamps and belts and lately, it's been postcards and novels/picture books written in foreign languages, of which the latter only started in 2008, my first being a book called "SPEAK GERMAN!" by Wolf Schneider that was given to me by
mario2006 <3
But my favourite and most actively accumulating collection is the one that I carry on my phone. My phone charms! They all have a story.

1.
The beetle from New York.
This was given to me by a very close friend of mine who is a year younger, on the debating team with me and also happens to be blind.
She tells the best anecdotal blind jokes. The first time I met her, I heard her yelling at some poor Year 7 kid,
" Dude, stop shouting at me. I'm blind, I'm not fucking DEAF!"
She trips over people she doesn't like with her stick and pretends it's an accident. She's insane on the piano.
.. and you wonder why I love her so much.
She is one of the most intelligent, high achieving, sensitive and caring individuals that I have been priveleged to encounter in my lifetime. Every time I look at that keychain, it's a reminder that even with the greatest adversity, with determination, passion and anecdotal blind jokes, we can get through anything.
2.
The giant Hello Kitty from Miyajima
Brings back memories, good and badly funny, of my Japan travels in the Christmas/New Year period of 2007-2008.
3.
The crystal cross made by my athiest aunt.
This particular aunt asked me what I'd like made in crystal, and I told her a cross. She refused to do it for some time, until one day she surprised by handing it directly to me before she left to catch her plane home to Canada.
Her parting words:
" You know Emily, I just couldn't resist seeing you smile."
She's a Christian now.
4.
Star bracelet.
A birthday present my brother bought for me when I was 6, when he used to call me "Emstar" (embarrassingly enough, he still does).I loved it so much, but my wrist got too big for it. Now it's on my phone!
5.
Scratched metal Hello Kitty
From my childhood sweetheart who moved overseas and faded into obscurity - his mum owned a $2 shop! I was 4 and his queen, he was 4 and a half, my king, the best hand-holder and a crazy castle-maker. I sometimes think about him, how he is and what he might be like now. I wonder if he remembers me!
6.
The silver bear
The keychain that my friend allegedly claims that allowed his company to break even (pay off all debt and begin to make profit), I bought off him for $2.50! A little goes a long way, amen?
]7.
Good luck charm from China
My parents, upon hearing that I collect phone charms, bought me this while they were in China in November 2008. Nice that they thought about me while the house was getting trashed!
In other news:
1. Here is the Sydney Harbour Bridge in several colours, taken by me with my dad's SLR from the north side of the Bridge when the fireworks went off.
My favourite ones that appeared in the city newspaper:
2. I freakin' HATE cleaning my ROOM! God help me, just looking at my desk induces an aneurysm. My dad has yelled at me exactly 8 times to clean up my room, but it's SO HARD!
See if you can spot:
- 3 x TIME magazine issues
- 1 x Carlton Dry beer bottle full of sand
- 1 x sticky-tape dispenser
- 1 x pair of scissors
- 1 x toothpick holder
- 6 x articles of clothing
It also hit me on NYE that I should put up my AUS and DE flags above my bed. It sounds really weird, but I used 3 globs of blue tack, 2 broken up toothpicks and a safety pin. It's a completely useless talent of mine to be ingenius bordering on impractical with household products.
3. Ok, so we're in an economic crisis. For my family, this has resulted in something so peculiar and paradoxical that it's laughable. My mother tends to go to the produce market every week to release her innate female urge to impulse buy anything that is labelled in a red "SALE" or red "SPECIAL", which results in ME (the only person who can BAKE in this household) having to practice a little 1930's depression-style cooking with 6 FUCKING HANDS OF BANANAS!!
Banana muffins 4 ways; banana fritters; banana splits; banana pancakes; banana cake; fruit salad of bananas, yoghurt and mint; bread and butter pudding with bananas; banana and choc toasties; banana milkshakes 2 ways (see below); barbequed bananas, baked and caramelised bananas; banana and walnut sticky-date pudding;
... and banana bread for all:)
This is the banana milkshake that went drastically wrong - notice the sick grey colour, due to the additives of kiwi fruit and strawberry yoghurt (my fault, because I'm obsessed with strawberries). Looks aside, it tasted surprisingly good!
If I see another banana for the rest of the year, I will shoot myself in the foot.
4. A very edible household tradition.
Every year, around New Years, we sit down as a family and make wontons. It's probably a derivative of some ancient archaic Chinese tradition, but that suits me fine. Ingredients are:
Store-bought wonton wrappers, black fungus, prawns, dried and shredded scallops, pork mince, eggs, soy sauce, oyster sauce, shallots, cornflour and sugar.
Close-up!
All done.
They are then boiled or steamed and accompianed with a clear broth, thin egg noodles and some baby bok choy.
But.. I like them on their own ;)
The finished product.
5. Soundtracks of my life for the past week.
a) Putting in contacts for the very first time:
JAWS Theme
b) Making a crazy new concotion in the kitchen:
Karma by
The Pitcher
c) Going shopping with my brother:
I'm Money by
Zebrahead
d)The song that made everyone vacate the dance floor at my graduation party:
Crank That by
Soulja Boy
e) Driving to the beach on New Years Day:
Take My Hand by
The Cab
f) Late nights when I couldn't go to sleep:
Emily by
Feeder
g) Being an angry, door-slamming, emotional youth:
Walking Disaster by
Sum 41
Revisited by
The Fold
And my favourite past-time...
h) Tracks I dance to in my room:
B-Boys & Flygirls by
Bomfunk MC's
Freeloader by
Driftwood
Junk by
Ferry Corsten
War Coz I'm Hard by
D-Block & S-Te-Fan
Voodoo by
A-Lusion
So, three questions and statement:
1. What do you hoard that makes no sense to anyone else?
2. How has the economic crisis affected you as of late?
3. Which tracks provide the combustion for your activity?
& A statement.
HAPPY NEW YEAR!